Obama’s 10 Biggest Jabs At Republicans During WH Correspondents’ Dinner
President Barack Obama took to the microphone Saturday evening for the annual White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner and wasted no time with one-liners.
He jabbed all around the political spectrum, but Obama saved most of his quips for Republicans.
Here are his most notable zingers:
10. Obama’s first GOP one-liner began with slight self-deprecation, noting that he’s getting “so old …” — and then adding that “… John Boehner’s already invited Netanyahu to speak at my funeral.”
Then it was on:
9. “Ted Cruz said denying the existence of climate change makes him like Galileo. That’s not really an apt comparison. Galileo believed the earth revolved around the sun; Ted Cruz believes the earth revolves around Ted Cruz. Just as an aside, I want to point out when a guy who has his face on a Hope poster calls you self-centered, you know you’ve got the narcissism index creeping up too high.”
8. “Meanwhile, Rick Santorum says he would not attend a same-sex wedding of a friend or a loved one, to which gays and lesbians across the country responded, ‘That’s not going to be a problem. Don’t sweat that one.’”
7. “Jeb Bush identified himself as Hispanic back in 2001. But, I understand — I identified myself as American back in 1961.”
6. ”Mike Huckabee recently said people shouldn’t join the military until a true conservative is elected president. Think about that. It was so outrageous that 47 Ayatollahs wrote us a letter trying to explain to Huckabee how the system works.”
5. “And Donald Trump is here. Still. Anyway.”
4. “Soon the first presidential contest will take place and I for one cannot wait for who the Koch brothers pick. Who will finally get that red rose? Marco Rubio, Rand Paul, Scott Walker, Ted Cruz, Jeb Bush. The winner gets the billion dollar war chest; the runner up gets to be the bachelor on the next season of ‘The Bachelor.’”
3. “The Koch brothers feel they have to spend $1 billion to get folks to like one of these people. I know I raised a lot of money. In all fairness, my middle name is Hussein. What’s their excuse?”
2.Obama noted that Michele Bachmann predicted he’d bring about the “biblical end of days. Now that’s a legacy. That’s big. Lincoln and Washington? They didn’t do that.”
1. Riffing on the serious miscues of the Secret Service, Obama then pointed at a video screen and showed the audience what he called “a foolproof way to keep people off my lawn”:
It should be noted that perhaps the most eye-opening portion of Obama’s speech was the participation of “Luther,” the president’s “anger translator.”
Conveying Obama’s apparent hidden hostility, Luther let it all hang out for the audience: “Hold on to your lily-white butts!” he yelled.